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Blog: Taglish · Categories: Non-Erotic · Tags:
Date: June 25, 2022 (1 month ago)


A/N: This is just a collection of a few of my deleted posts. Came across these while I was searching for something in my archived folder. Re-posting to remind me of how tanga I was way back :) And all these were posted between August to November of last year............

1/3

"Oist! I'm 3 inches taller today. "

A simple message I sent you this morning. Actually, it was a caption sa isang picture na ni-send ko sa TG mo. A picture of me wearing my 3-inch wedge na pang-4th time ko palang sinuot since I bought this pair a year ago. That pic also showed my multi-colored toenails .

Been ages since I had my nails painted, let alone in different colors. Ewan. Maybe I just needed to see some changes in me. Or maybe I just like the colors of my nail polish. Or maybe, I just wanted to show you something. Whatever…

There are so many things I wanted to tell you. Answers to questions you asked me the last time we talked.

Is my hair still long? Yes, and my hair is even longer now.

Am I fully vaccinated already? Yes, I had my second dose last Thursday. And the whole time I was there sa hospital, you were in my thoughts simply because you were with me when I had my first.

Now pwede na akong magbakasyon. And yes, I'll definitely tell you when I'm going home, once I'll finalize my schedule to go on vacay, as you requested.

Am I still scared of kulog? Yes, and everytime naulan with matching kulog, my thoughts would go astray to those rainy days and nights na you were there to comfort me.

Ha! Ewan. I just had this sudden urge to write something to ease whatever burden that still weighs heavily within me.

And yes, I deleted that message I sent you kasi alam ko naman kung anong sasabihin mo.

You would just say, "and so?…."

****

2/3

"And so?...." The last two words you said sa Viber before the day we broke up. Every single day, binabalikan ko ang araw na 'yon. Andaming what-ifs na gumugulo sa utak ko.

What if hindi kita tinanong bakit ka tumawag sa oras na 'yon? You would normally call right after my lunch time, kabisado mo anong oras ako dapat tapos na kumain. But that day, you called just a few minutes after 12. Why?

What if hindi ako stressed sa work nun at hindi kita sinungitan?

What if tinawagan kita nung pauwi ka na? I didn't even realize na hindi ka nag-message nung pauwi ka na sa sobrang inis ko sa ka-workmate ko dahil sa isang deadline.

What if hindi kita tinarayan the day after?

What if what happened that day didn't happen at all, makakahanap ka pa rin kaya ng window to break up with me?

We will never find out, would we? OR maybe, yes, kasi what we had should not have happened in the first place.

Three weeks ago, nung nalaman kong may iba ka na, I thought that was the last time I would cry because of you. But I was wrong. Siguro nga mas mahaba pa ang time na kelangan ko para maka-move on ako sa 'yo kesa duration na naging tayo. Kaya hindi ako naniniwala sa sinasabi nilang three-month rule eh.

Yes, it has been three months pero bakit ganun pa din kasakit?

****

3/3

"Life's about joy.
Life's about pain.
It's all about forgiving and the will to walk away"

I had planned to post something to mark my 8th year anniversary dito sa FSS kaya lang pain got the better of me, so….

So... Eight years. Six heartaches. Taena,...

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Joined: September 7, 2013 (8 years old)
Writings: 30
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If I turn my back on you, question yourself not me.
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It’s okay if you don’t like me. I was not born to impress you.
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